Dating in A Digital World

By: Katie Coviello

Dating culture has been totally and completely transformed by the ubiquitous presence of social media. What used to be calls on the phone, handwritten notes, or actual face-to-face interaction has turned into left/right swipes on Tinder and Bumble, a flirty comment or a simple ‘like’ on an Instagram picture, and the dreaded DM.

This isn’t to say that social media hasn’t provided us with so many fun ways to communicate with people. Hell, I’ve even gone on a successful Tinder date (sorry, Mom)! But when it comes to all things dating, people our age tend to use things like Snapchat as an easy way out. I think part of the reason is because dating culture in college has become hookup culture. Social media and other factors have changed our expectations towards instant gratification, which isn’t sustainable long-term. Hear me out, I love a good Snapchat streak. I get to see all of my friends’, and more-than-friends’ faces every day in a casual way. I can see what you’re up to and send you a funny video or talk about something quickly. In this way, Snapchat is great.

The problem comes when people use Snapchat as their primary form of communication to express interest in others. I know so many people who have experienced this, including me. Whether it’s a normal conversation, plans for a date, or most commonly a late-night booty-call, it is often done through Snapchat DMing. This creates a disconnect not only because the messages on Snapchat are fleeting, but also because people are more likely sending the same Snapchats to more than one person. It’s like mass-dating and makes things much more convoluted.

Face-to-face contact is so important! And without it, we end up losing a lot of what makes relationships meaningful and worthwhile.  While Snapchat and other apps are fun ways of communicating, in reality, they will never lead to anything substantial. So, in the wise words of the Spice Girls, “If you wanna be my lover, get out of my DMs.”